Oct, 2025

Fri 31th

• I found that sound is the on of the greatest distraction rival for focusing and meditation.
• I pick my laptop to work, it works so great! I can read a lot about English grammar until my brain get exhausted. Then I changed to HTML lesson which work great. It means that what exhausted is my brain not my eyes.
• I found that coffee is not that good, my hand was shaking while work and also my focus.

Thu 30th

• I think I have to read at least two books of English grammar.

Wed 29th

• My meditation is so much better, after I sleep longer for 8 hours.

Sat 25th

• Even walking gives me a lot of ideas
• Who I can really trust? even talking to my mom never sooth me, instead, it always makes me feel anxious.
• I’ve just discovered that changing of my emotion can also change my breath rhythm.
• I found that even when reading on screen, the plenty of desk light is important. I found that if the environment and the display brightness don’t match with each other, my eye can’t focus on the text well and it gets fatigue very easy.

Fri 24th

• There is no like or dislike, it is just your delusion.

Thu 23rd

• I would not doing laundry by my hand any more because it is a very inefficient activity that consume a lot of time(around 30-45min/time x3 = 1:30-2:15 hrs per week), not productive(I waste a lot of time but the amount of clothes able to wash are very far less than using machine.), and it also makes my room unclean by the water left on the floor.

Mon20th

• I hope there would be no computers in this world, so that I won’t get addicted.
• When you are quite confident in timing and want to go all in, you have to spare 30% of your capital fund in case you are wrong. But for DCA just separate the fund to 1/4 per week.
• I think I would try reading dentistry all at work but reading what I like all after work.
• Read(passive) – > speak(active), write(active) – > listen(passive)
• I found that the amount of carbohydrate that body can handle in a day has limitation by beta cell in pancreas, which means that if I eat carbohydrate too much it will strain these cell and cause insulin resistance.
  • what truly strain the body is highly refined carb, not complex carb. Because I use to eat

Sun 19th

• Today, I masturbated in the morning, which caused me to lose focus all day!!
• I found that the prolonged fasting method with ad libitum on 4 continuous feeding days didn’t worsen my blood sugar; instead, it is quite a bit better not only my blood sugar, but my cognitive function as well. I can now calculate numbers faster in my mind.

Sat 18th

• 3 day prolonged fasting reset my insulin resistance(FBS from 110 at 1st day to 80 at the 3rd day)
  • The next question is can I gain weight by exercise, and eat not that much, then do 3 day prolonged fasting again(periodically).
    • I think my body have limitation in managing carbohydrate. If I eating too much, my body will not be able to handle the nutrient which result in storing of visceral fat.
  • So, today I try eating without tightening my stomach(proper amount of dense nutrients, not too much, not too small).
• Acer swift 14 AI
  • The display is quite subpar compared to the MacBook Air. It’s like the screen anti-glare (matte) layer causes flare of light around the text, which causes strain on the eyes and hard to read.

Fri 17th

• I found that I just got attached to my reading for around 2 days, then I lost my attention in them and felt lost in what to do. I should find psychological factors to get me attached to books.
  • I think the books has its own interesting, but something steals the attention which is Social media and online life.
• This is the third day of prolonged fasting. At the 60 hours, I can do a very deep meditation.
  • My blood glucose going to normal stage after fasting for 48 hours, and become better at 60 hours.
• I think I would try creating new WordPress template theme.

Tue 14th

• I felt like my body was screaming when I ate without limit on the feeding day. It said that it needed some rest from food that causes oxidative stress. The true rest can only be provided by Prolonged fasting and exercise.

Mon 13rd

• Buckwheat contains non-fiber attached starch, which makes me unable to concentrate well and deteriorates my reading on the weekend.
• I think I should read what I want, not only Dentistry.
  Because even if I determine to read only dentistry, I still can’t read even a single page.
  If I can’t read even a single page, it might not be for me.
  I should try reading what I want at least half of the time that I have. Then try reading Dentistry again to see if my focus is better or not.
• I wonder if prolonged fasting didn’t help my brain improvement. My Tetris score decreased to 9900 points from ~30000 points before. Also, my reading becomes a lot slower, which is usually the result of brain rot.
• Some environment provides a lot of learning stuff, instead some provide entertainment
  • If a laptop provides a lot of entertainment, what environment provides a learning influence?

Sun 12nd

• I feel quite regretful and a bit pitiful to myself that I lost 5 years of my time for nothing but just bad and toxic people. For those 5 years, I could read a lot of books that I liked, such as Chemistry, Physics, and Mathematics.
  • I have to try a lot harder to read books to gain knowledge. However, it still needs time, even though I tried 2 times harder.
• Why the hell that even though it is on my weekend, I can’t find any time to read, but just eat, eat, and eat.
• Today, I didn’t read any of the dentistry books. Was that because they weren’t suitable for me? Should I try reading the other, such as programming?
  • Programming as Major and Dentistry as Minor job
  • Or is that because my mind was just blown away by social media and binge eating?
    • Before sleep, I got my consciousness back, and I found that my tight belly feeling might disturb and distract me from focusing on the text.

Sat 11st

• I’m not sure that eating itself makes me unable to concentrate on reading a book, or the habit that I usually watching entertainment things.
  • I would try reading while eating, not watching those entertainment things.
• Reading while opening the air conditioner is the best condition for focusing. It’s just that simple.
• I think I have to choose between knowing many things but superficially and being an expert in one thing but not caring about the rest. The first choice is achieved by following good social media content, and the second choice is achieved by quitting using social media but studying.
  • The first choice might feel safe, but it isn’t truly safe. The second choice might seem hard and tiring, but it has real benefits to yourself and the world.

Sat 4th

• I am addicted to entertainment much more than normal people are. It might be because I met a toxic relationship environment in the past. But prolonged fasting, self-reflection, and fixing a routine schedule might help.
• The fixed routine schedule helps me overcome the addiction. By listing all activities within a day, hour by hour, I see the potential to have abundant time to read all what I want, if I follow the schedule.
  • Seeing potential to be successful makes me regret losing to my addiction, then I prefer to choose to follow the schedule to get the time to read books as a reward.

Thu 2nd

• I found that working creates messiness in my mind, which even evening meditation can’t completely clear it off. However, after meditation, my reading is much better.